July 10, San Mateo, CA: Friday. I am feeling the urge to do nothing this weekend. But I do have brunch tomorrow, so I'm not going to be a shut-in for the next 48 hours. I was able to reach out to someone at work today who was just having a terrible day. I had seen them frustrated before, and they make absolutely no secret about their displeasure. I definitely think that their way of communicating is arming (as opposed to disarming), because many managers just cannot handle a lot of emotion on the job. I'd guess that's why the facts or the message sometimes gets garbled...some people only see the emotion. As I talked to them, I kept referencing situations at places where I had worked before and how I was so angry, hurt, frustrated, but knew that the only thing that could help me were the facts. That doesn't mean that I didn't have emotional outbursts or learn the hard way. It feels really difficult to separate the two, even when you know that's the only way to get the changes you want. In particular, the perception of bias is one of the most distracting, destructive, and evil points of view, and its easy to go there when you think nothing's going your way. Today's talk reminded me how valuable it is to understand your (my) propensity to look for bias or judgment where it may not exist. Once that happens, coping at work is so much easier.